The Influencers - pt3 -Mark Bender (Father)

When I decided to do these blogs on people that have impacted my life in tremendous ways, the obvious choice of people instrumental in helping me become who I am today would no doubt be my father. Of the people I selected to write about, I chose no order or he of course would be the first person I would write about, but everyone I write about means something very special to me.

My dad is one of the greatest men of God that I have ever known. He is a man that just believed in me and in what I wanted to do, and what I felt God wanted me to do. He has showed me support from the smallest thing like a pat on the back and a "you can do it" all the way to huge financial investments he has made in my future.

I always knew that my dad cared about me, and that he Loved me, but in summer of 2004 he did something that I will remember forever, even though he probably already has forgotten... something that helped me know completely, that he was behind my dream, not even because he liked what I was doing as much as for how much he Loved me and wanted me to be happy. Hyperbole recorded an album in California with a producer out there, and we were having some trouble getting the tracks from the guy that had done it... in fact for months we couldn't even get ahold of him. One day he said, come and work for a week on the guitar parts, and I will send you home with the tracks... basically, we had to go back to California. I called all of my band mates, tried to rally the troops, but no one was able to go... it was nothing on them, I understand, but at the time I was really upset about it because this was my dream and there was nothing more important then getting those tracks and finishing that album so we could move forward with the dream. I literally was prepared to goto California by myself and get them but my parents said that there was no way that was happening. I begged them, I literally at one point even cried because I felt like this project was killing my dream and I had to get it done, and it had been killed to the point that even my own band mates were not willing to make the trip because they had better things to do... this was mostly in my head, but it messed me up... Finally my dad said, "I will go with you." He was literally prepared to get in a car for 3 days each way, drive all the way to California just so I could get some music tracks and bring them home. That meant the world to me.... I don't really know why other then the fact that my dad had a bad back and bad knees so I knew he really truly did not want to be in the car that long, take that much time off of work, etc. but he actually was willing to do it, and completely for me. For some reason, that was probably the most important feeling my dad ever gave me... the knowledge that he would give up a lot of time and comfort, to make me feel that much closer to my dream. He ended up not having to go, Andrew our drummer ended up going with me and at the last second we rallied a couple friends up and it was an amazing trip... but it would be sure been cool if it ended up being just me and dad too.

Its not just that, its everything. My dad answers every question I have, he offers me sound advice whenever I need it, he answers my calls at all hours of the night. He Loves me, believes in me, and wants to see my dreams come true. I hope that I someday am able to repay him for all that he has invested in me, show him as love much as he has showered my with my whole life, and take him to every baseball stadium in California :)

Its hard living so far away from my parents, but I know that they Love me, and I know that they would do anything for me... What an influence.

j-cub